SONOFABITCH!

no...not the band, the loud and heartfelt curse! i did take my new boat up to the river today; foregoing sleep and discomfort, knowing full well that i would be damning myself to a truly painful night at work all for the sake of jumping off waterfalls in a fantastic new kayak. well, wouldn't you know, i am again proven to be too clever for my own good. the zipper we "fixed" in order to make the kayak a viable water vehicle in spite of that being the reason the craft was so inexpensive? we didn't really fix it at all. pump it up to rocket weight and boom, zipper let's go. fuck. no rigid boat.

i am a big man. it is a small boat. it was not being run correctly. i was too heavy. please refer to the post title.

i had to relinquish my new boat to our friend, bushman, who is half my size, and watch him tool around and get drunk in my new boat, while i became the guide for the whitewater raft and the three newbies going down heavy rapids for the first time. what this means is, i got really wet, i did an unreasonable amount of paddling, and was generally robbed of a great deal of fun trying to get the asshole in the front right to believe that i wasn't shouting "pull" and "drag" for my own health, but for the health of the hull of the boat and the high hopes of hitting the good parts of the rapids!

a rushed trip home from the river itself gave me a scant hour to prepare for work. a tricky and trying endeavour when all you want to do is sleep. about half way through the night, my right leg starts to itch. soon thereafter, it starts to burn...and yes, by then i have put two and two together and come up with: "i forgot to put suntan lotion on a leg that i was expecting to leave in the sheath of a kayak for the duration of the day." that's right, kids, the leg in the boat, wet and exposed all day long, is burned to a freaking crisp. what a great day...i need to go to sleep right now.

please, travis, be sleeping!